I stole this from my friend's Facebook page

Informal Holiday Drunk Driving Survey (in the classroom)

Me: Tell me what you already know about St. Patrick's Day.

Student: St. Patrick's Day is the holiday with the most drunk driving.

Me: Well you know St. Patrick's Day is not actually a holiday in the United States. We celebrate St. Patrick's Day here, but it is not considered a holiday. What do you think might be the holiday with the most incidents of drunk driving?

Random student answers: "New Year's!" "Christmas!" "Easter!", etc.

One student in particular: Saturday!

Me: Which Saturday?

One student in particular: All of them.

Me: Well you know Saturday isn't actually a holiday, it's just a day of the week.

One student in particular: Well, Russian New Year then.

Birth Control

HAHAHA

Today's Quote

Me: "What are some other expenses you might have on your monthly budget? Remember your monthly income is $1,563."

Student: "Best Buy."

Me: "What do you want to buy at Best Buy?"

Student: "I want to buy Best Buy."

Me: "You mean you want to actually buy Best Buy, the store?"

Student: "Yeah, I want to buy that store."

Oh Canada...

So, I'm not here to gloat about who the best country in the world is at hockey. It's obviously Canada and there did not need to be another double gold medal Olympic performance to prove it. What I am here to state my opinion about, briefly, is the post-gold performance celebration by the Canadian women caught on camera. I think it's hilarious. The only people who made a big deal about it (as far as I know) were the citizens of the United States. The only mistake I think the Canadians made were perhaps allowing the 18 year-old to be photographed. She probably should have slammed some beers in the locker room between photos and then returned to the ice to celebrate with her teammates. Or perhaps poured her beverage in a Pepsi bottle, or Coke bottle, like my mom used to do when she thought she was hiding her drinking from us. That would have done the trick. At any rate, the celebration photos only show that I am still proud of the two greatest parts of being Canadian: hockey and partying. Go Canada!